WRITER’S CAVEAT: This post was written when we still had the problem. We solved it without Cesar, with patience, more patience, and more patience.
When I take the dog out to drain him, I have to take with me several items; first, a bag containing his latest overnight deposit, along with two more bags for his second and third upcoming anticipatory set. I need to get a collar around his neck, attach a leash, take the bell he rings with us so I can ring it while he drains (so he will associate tinkling the bell on the front door handle with tinkling on the lawn); I need my keys and sunglasses, and now, since the dog is becoming a loud mouthed teenager, I have to carry his previously retired jar containing several pennies, which I shake to startle him when he barks at strangers. Anyone know Cesar Milan’s cell phone number? Any suggestions? And now, let us pray.
There is one life.
This life is Dog.
This life is perfect.
This life is my life now.
Wherever we go, we go with Dog. Every tree, every hydrant awaits in anticipation of our visit. Every act of elimination is perfect, just as Dog would wish it to be. Dog knows the way to happiness. Dog knows how to love unconditionally. Dog, help me to be the person my dog thinks I am. I know this is the truth because I believe in Dog and my word is divine cause. Dog is all-loving.
I accept Dog, and love Dog,
and dog accepts and loves me.
I release my thoughts to Dog, knowing they will return to me, multipiled.
And so it is.
Amen.