©2012, Mirror Image Presentations
This is a piece from my stand up days.
Bill Clinton took a survey of all the married women in Washington D.C. and learned 50% of them were unfaithful to their husbands. So, he composed a letter and sent it via e-mail to the other 50% of women. And you know what it said? Oh, I guess you didn’t get a copy. Bill wanted to warn the ladies about the new Spy Kit program that tracks your spouse’s every move.
While doing so, it logs everything onto a third party website that then forwards the content of all activities; incoming and outgoing phone calls, text messages, Google searches and websites visited. It even tracks movement in vehicles. So, a wife can be at home in Toledo washing her hubby’s shorts while monitoring her spouse’s every move — anywhere on the planet.
Is that good news or bad news? I guess, depending on which side of the fence you stand on, this could be good or bad news. The sad thing is this technology was created only after the Internet undermined nearly 50% of all marriages with infidelity. Anyone who has ever attended a business meeting in Las Vegas knows how long it takes, till business turns to play. Remember now, what happens in Vegas no longer stays in Vegas, but goes directly to your spouse on DVD — in real time. Keeping one’s zipper in the upright and locked position seems so much more cost effective than risking getting caught.
Caveat infidelis! Cheaters beware!
There is one life.
This life is God.
This life is perfect — unless I am cheating on your spouse.
This life is my life now but when my spouse finds out it won’t be for long.
I accept that now, not only will God know, but my spouse will know as well.
I release my word knowing how remaining fidel can be more cost effective than cheating.
And so it is.